As 2009 comes to a close...

As 2009 comes to a close:

This has been a big year for me. I learned a lot about myself this year and learned how to live.

Things I've done in 2009:
1. I've learned to live without my niece and nephew by my side 24/7. Since I was 9 they have been a major part of my life and most people thought they were my very own kids. In January, they moved with my sister to NC and I have not seen them much this year. It hurts and not a day goes by that I don't miss them, but I'm so happy that my sister has finally settled down and they get to experience actually having a mother.
2. I turned 18. They say this is the age of living, the age of freedom, and the day you really become alive. I didn't notice any changes the day I turned 18, but now looking back, so much has changed. I know I am no longer a child. I've grown up in so many ways. Looking back, I don't even feel like the same person.
3. I graduated highschool. Getting to that point was so hard. Dealing with medical problems that no one understood and fighting to graduate becuase of the same exact fact...NO ONE UNDERSTANDS!!! The life I live everyday is soo hard. Which leads me to this..
4. I've learned to just deal with it. No, the pain is still sometimes unbareable and sometimes I still can't get out of bed, but before I was embarrassed to sit at school or hang with friends because of what I've learned to laugh and call "the bears". My tummy makes obnoxious noises and growls all day. If it gets started, it's not stopping that day and though it's soo embarrassing, I've just learned to look around, laugh, and ask "did you hear that?" followed by a laugh and "It's them bears."
5. I got a new car. Hmm..well apparently I thought I was getting a really good car for graduation, but as we were signing papers for the car, the lay who owned it decided she wanted to take it to get the transmission fixxed before signing it over because something was tapping. This resulted in me waiting from the week of graduation until the first week in July for me to get my car. The result, a 95 mustang convertable whos transmission still slips and it's gear shift is messed up(meaning my park is my reverse and reverse is my drive.) Over the few months I have had it my radio has died, thank goodness I have my old one to soon get put in..hmm it's beed dead since August. My dad promised to fix it over Christmas break. Also, my drivers window motor has decided to play against me also. I have to physically press the button and pull or push the window in whichever direction I would like. Oh well, that too shall be fixxed soon. Hopefully I also get my headlights I've had since summer put in finally ( Black Halogen Headlights). He promised to also put those in during the break. I did make the car prettyful by adding pink all over it :)
6. Over the summer, I learned a lot about living. Thats all I need to say on that subject.
7. I lost friends and gained friends. I lost friends and gained them back. After graduation, you learn who your real friends are.
8. I started college. I passed all my classes in my first semester and made a lot of wonderful new friends who have touched my heart and become my life in soo many different ways. I will hate to see many of them go, some of which I will not see in the New Year and others who I will only get a short time with in 2010. I guess we better live it up right.
9. I've had my share of partying and there will be plenty more to come next year.
10. I even threw up for the first time from drinking, not the funnest thing in the world, but yet a college experience.
11. I've road with the top down in 30 or lower degree weather at 5 in the morning after hiking through mud in heels through the woods with friends.
12. I've hiked through the woods drunk, hmm not fun when everybody you are with has been drinking.
13. This year I've started REALLY wearing makeup. No, I do not mean I cake it on. I just mean, before I only put on a teeny bit or sometimes even none, but this year I've learned that I feel more grown and myself with it and I usually do not leave the house without it.
14. This year I have learned that both my brother and my sister will be getting married.
15. This year we have 2 Christmas trees instead of one.
16. This year my baby niece, Kadance, started school..hmm don't I feel OLD!!
17. My family has also increased this year. We gained Cannon and Kherington who are both beautiful babies. And also of course Bryan and his littler girl, Haley (sp?) and Joyce and her littler girl, Vianne.

This year has been an amazing year and I would not have it any other way!

Things I wish to do in 2010:
1. Live!
2. Laugh...
3. LOVE!!!!!
4. I hope within the next few months I get the courage to say words that are in my heart that need to come out before it's too late.
5. I hope to have a job.
6. I hope to visit Miami atleat once.
7. I hope to do good on the Spanish placement test so I can take some spanish medical classes.
8. I hope to experience a good spring break with wonderful friends, followed by a wonderful summer.
9. I hope to make many more new friends and not to lose any.
10. I hope to do good in classes in the next few semesters.
11. I hope that even as the people I love leave me that we continue to be friends and stay close.
12. I also hope I do not lose my chance.
13. I hope to see wonderful marriages and growing families within my family.
14. I hope that I meet a good guy or get the one thats already in front of me.
15. Lastly, I hope that 2010 is another year without regrets and another year lived to the fullest!!!

I wish everyone Happy Holidays, a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year :)